'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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