Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
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well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
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That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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