Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize