am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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