He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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