I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
They took my balls.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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