im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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