Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize