Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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