Yo dont text me then not text me
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
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