I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
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i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
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IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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