I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize