im drinking this country out of the recession.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize