"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
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