Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
This gyro tastes like lonliness
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize