Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
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