I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize