her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize