i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize