If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize