Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
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can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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