Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
More tranny stories later!
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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