if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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