After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
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