is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I wear drunk well.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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