Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
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It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
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The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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