brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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