Texts From Last Night

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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  people would bow to what i just did to her vagina

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  (901): people would bow to what i just did to her vagina http://tfl.nu/rxjb
  Replies (31) Good night (7188) Bad night (456) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.

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  (410): it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job. http://tfl.nu/iasx
  Replies (12) Good night (384) Bad night (2977) Order T-Shirt
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  (972): View more from Texas

  He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.

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  (972): He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me. http://tfl.nu/b757
  Replies (22) Good night (5076) Bad night (437) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.

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  (516): All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job. http://tfl.nu/ssdv
  Replies (8) Good night (635) Bad night (3458) Order T-Shirt
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  (585): View more from New York

  there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk

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  (585): there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk http://tfl.nu/9sjy
  Replies (21) Good night (1460) Bad night (3707) Order T-Shirt
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  (904): View more from Florida

  I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.

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  (904): I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. http://tfl.nu/je7l
  Replies (15) Good night (2319) Bad night (978)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?

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  (317): on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week? http://tfl.nu/z5ru
  Replies (10) Good night (1735) Bad night (498) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher

  (312): View more from Illinois

  And maybe a life coach?

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  (303): So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher (312): And maybe a life coach? http://tfl.nu/dluc
  Replies (2) Good night (2001) Bad night (515)
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  (587): View more from Alberta

  Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?

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  (587): Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant? http://tfl.nu/fsev
  Replies (11) Good night (1210) Bad night (1446) Order T-Shirt
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  (212): View more from New York

  The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.

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  (212): The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you. http://tfl.nu/c03k
  Replies (9) Good night (2253) Bad night (799) Order T-Shirt
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.

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  (250): Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles. http://tfl.nu/jjec
  Replies (6) Good night (1329) Bad night (404) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.

  (1-401): View more from Rhode Island

  Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table

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  (401): Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it. (1-401): Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table http://tfl.nu/unxn
  Replies (5) Good night (858) Bad night (252) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.

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  (847): She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid. http://tfl.nu/spee
  Replies (3) Good night (789) Bad night (227) Order T-Shirt
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.

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  (260): I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business. http://tfl.nu/cc6r
  Replies (1) Good night (462) Bad night (121)
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  (408): View more from California

  Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain

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  (408): Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain http://tfl.nu/bezg
  Replies (2) Good night (524) Bad night (179) Order T-Shirt

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