Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Randomize
Follow @tfln