so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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