If i could tip my vagina, i would.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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