i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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