maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
i think i have two assholes
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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