Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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