So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
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My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
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I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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