So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
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did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
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I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
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