party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize