That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize