Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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