I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Randomize