Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God gave him joint rollers for hands
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize