38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize