Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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