Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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