Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
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I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
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after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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