Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
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I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
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So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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