The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
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