I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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