I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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