I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize