a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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